The Beauty of Silence

[SparklySarah]

I was up on Dartmoor earlier on this year, and decided to write a little verse on it. See what you think!! I would like to know other peoples opinions on my writing because I am thinking of publishing my poetry book on nature and the like. Well, here goes!!!!

The Beauty of Silence

Up on Dartmoor was the first time I had felt relaxed and at peace in a very long while. We were driving down a long unfenced road that ran through the heart of the moor, dodging the sheep, and the thing that struck me the most was the sheer scale and expanse of the landscape. We passed through a place that had almost completely been claimed by the beauty of nature. I think the only things that were not natural were the roads and the few cars that ran along them. There were a few houses dotted around in the folds of the hills, but they blended in so well they seemed a part of the moors. Even the old mines had been claimed by the wild.

The wildlife around looked so at peace with their surroundings; the sheep milled around the road, even lying on the tarmac, completely oblivious to the traffic. There were (of course) the ponies scattered across the hills, many of them with young or expecting. The foals were flitting around, enjoying the evening air. Everything was so blissful and calm.

We decided to stop at the side and walk over to a rocky outcrop a little distance away. Along the way the ground was carpeted with tiny flowers; stone crop and another little white flower. The gorse was not in flower yet; you know how the saying goes…

When we got to the top, the view stunned me. You could literally see for miles; green stretched out around me, dotted with speckles of colour and a couple of thatched houses. Something caught my eye further down and I wandered across to see what lay beyond. As I sat on a rocky ledge I was immersed in the beauty of the silence that enveloped the moors. The only sounds I could here were the chattering of birds and the sheep calling to each other. I sat for what seemed like hours, gazing out at the vastness that surrounded me. There, at that time, I finally felt free. I felt as if every thing had been lifted from me and the desire for solitude had never been so great. I was reluctant to go; I thought that if I stayed there a little while longer, I would finally be lost in the silence.

Walking back, I went behind the outcrop and suddenly the wind dropped and all I could hear was my own heartbeat. Momentarily, all the world hung still and held its breath, not wanting to break the moment. As I walked back on a different route to the others, I thought Yes, I could live here. A little thatched cottage, tucked in the folds of the hills, and a horse so I could ride at my leisure across the country. I would write my books and fulfil my dream of becoming an author.

And as I sit here writing this in my tent, I think of my years ahead, living in such a beautiful, vast expanse, listening to the sounds of the moors and admiring the beauty of silence.

By Sarah E B Williams ©
16/06/07


All comments welcome!!

Sarah

P.S: Sorry it's so long!!

[Pete Collins]

Is that what they mean by 'purple prose'?

I think it's very good - in my mind I could see and feel exactly what you were describing.

[Amiguru]

Most evocative Sarah. You deserve encouragement to develope your style as you get older as your sensitivity to all around you is evident. May I say also that it is a brave thing to do to present your work to the world and invite comment. May any criticism, if it occurs, be constructive and do continue to be true to yourself.

[Pete Collins]

I was going to edit my earlier post just to make it clearer that my joke about 'purple prose' was a reference to the COLOUR not the QUALITY of your writing, but I don't seem to be able to edit it, presumably because Amiguru has since added a further post to the thread. Anyway, I regret the joky comment, as you obviously want serious feedback about your work.

I am very surprised more people haven't commented on your writing.

I agree with Amiguru about you being brave to put your work up for criticism. I enjoyed reading it, and as I said before, I could envisage exactly what you were seeing and feeling.

Good luck with your attempts at becoming an author - it's a pretty tough area to break into, though, I believe. Have you thought of trying to start out by writing articles for magazines and so on?

[Amiguru]

Originally Posted by Pete Collins

I was going to edit my earlier post just to make it clearer that my joke about 'purple prose' was a reference to the COLOUR not the QUALITY of your writing, but I don't seem to be able to edit it, presumably because Amiguru has since added a further post to the thread. Anyway, I regret the joky comment, as you obviously want serious feedback about your work.

I am very surprised more people haven't commented on your writing.

I believe one has fifteen minutes for editing Pete and then your post is locked
I too am surprised that there have not been more comments from all the lovely people on WAB, especially as there have been 51 views to present but I suppose that includes non-members.

Come on guys, put the 'Sparkle' back in SparklySarah's eyes

[Kymba]

I grew up in Devon and spent many hours of my childhood and adult life wandering and enjoying Dartmoor.
I think what you have written is really Great and definately captured the feel of dartmoor

[SparklySarah]

Originally Posted by Amiguru

Most evocative Sarah. You deserve encouragement to develope your style as you get older as your sensitivity to all around you is evident. May I say also that it is a brave thing to do to present your work to the world and invite comment. May any criticism, if it occurs, be constructive and do continue to be true to yourself.

Yes, mum thought it was very brave!!

Originally Posted by Pete Collins

I was going to edit my earlier post just to make it clearer that my joke about 'purple prose' was a reference to the COLOUR not the QUALITY of your writing, but I don't seem to be able to edit it, presumably because Amiguru has since added a further post to the thread. Anyway, I regret the joky comment, as you obviously want serious feedback about your work.

I love any comment on my work, serious or not!!!! Gives me something to laugh about!

Thanks for the replies, I like hearing what others think. I am going totry and set up a website with my poetry on it, to I will post if I am sucsessful!

Sarah

[SparklySarah]

Originally Posted by Amiguru

Most evocative Sarah. You deserve encouragement to develope your style as you get older as your sensitivity to all around you is evident. May I say also that it is a brave thing to do to present your work to the world and invite comment. May any criticism, if it occurs, be constructive and do continue to be true to yourself.

Yes, mum thought it was very brave!!

Originally Posted by Pete Collins

I was going to edit my earlier post just to make it clearer that my joke about 'purple prose' was a reference to the COLOUR not the QUALITY of your writing, but I don't seem to be able to edit it, presumably because Amiguru has since added a further post to the thread. Anyway, I regret the joky comment, as you obviously want serious feedback about your work.

Don't regret it, I love any comment on my work, serious or not!!!! Gives me something to laugh about, so joke away!

Thanks for the replies, I like hearing what others think. I am going totry and set up a website with my poetry on it, to I will post if I am sucsessful!

Sarah

[demicav]

Well I just returned from 2 weeks in Wales on saturday and still playing catch up with WAB. May I say that I think the verse is very beautiful and uplifting. I've never been to Dartmoor ( it's on my to do list ) but you describe it in such a way that I really felt I could see for myself the beauty of it. I have times when I feel like that in Wales, all alone amongst the wildlife and nature, it can make you forget your troubles and be truly thankful that you're alive.
Well done, I enjoyed reading it,

Lorraine.

[SparklySarah]

Just reading through it with mum and noticed some spelling mistakes!! Will correct those! It comes from typing too fast........ Oh well, should make sence!

Demicav, hope you enjoyed your stay in Wales, some beautiful scenery there. Will hopefully come up with a verse when I next go there; I am trying to get some collected together to make a book of discriptive verses for different areas. Glad you enjoyed reading it.

[SparklySarah]

p.s can someone delete the first of the double post above, got confused with the slow internet!!

[Amiguru]

Originally Posted by demicav

Well I just returned from 2 weeks in Wales on saturday and still playing catch up with WAB. May I say that I think the verse is very beautiful and uplifting. I've never been to Dartmoor ( it's on my to do list ) but you describe it in such a way that I really felt I could see for myself the beauty of it. I have times when I feel like that in Wales, all alone amongst the wildlife and nature, it can make you forget your troubles and be truly thankful that you're alive.
Well done, I enjoyed reading it,

Lorraine.

May I ask whereabouts you've been in Wales? I ask as I was born in Morfa Nefyn on the Lleyn Peninsula.

Sorry Sarah to intrude on your thread to ask this question

[SparklySarah]

Originally Posted by Amiguru

May I ask whereabouts you've been in Wales? I ask as I was born in Morfa Nefyn on the Lleyn Peninsula.

Sorry Sarah to intrude on your thread to ask this question

I don't mind at all!! It's nice to see who knows what area in Wales, having welsh blood myself. I've been mostly to the area round Llansteffan where mum was born, and Pembroke. My grandad was ordained in St David's cathedral. Beautiful around there.

Sarah

(I also fell off a bolting horse in Wales!! That was interesting! Lovely area where I was riding though. )

[Loopy2]

Sparkly Saraha

Lovely verse

One of my all time favourite places.

[demicav]

Originally Posted by Amiguru

May I ask whereabouts you've been in Wales? I ask as I was born in Morfa Nefyn on the Lleyn Peninsula.

Sorry Sarah to intrude on your thread to ask this question

I went to Pwllheli, I absolutely love the area, it's beautiful, still retaining so much natural beauty. We go every year, it's heaven and they have a very nice Adder population as an extra magnet.

[christina]

As I read your work I held my breath, to me it is beautiful and, as others have said, I too could see and feel all that surrounded you...I would say go for it, you are a writer in the making. As for the "purple prose" joke, I realised instantly what was meant and understood that there was no malice intended

[derekmc]

Sarah -

It's been years since I've been to Dartmoor, but my wife and I regularly go up into the hills and moorland on our trips back to her home village in Dumfries and Galloway. I've never really found the words to express my own feelings, though I've tried to do it in paintings and photographs. It looks like you've done it for me.

I've always enjoyed writers who can capture the spirit of a place, like Thomas Hardy, and I must say that yours is a beautifully crafted description. Like Pete, if I close my eyes I can just picture Dartmoor as you saw it on that day. I particularly liked the line "Momentarily, all the world hung still and held its breath, not wanting to break the moment". We all need times like that to realise what's important.

Follow your dream, Sarah - you've certainly got the talent to make it work.

All the best,
Derek

[Amiguru]

Originally Posted by demicav

I went to Pwllheli, I absolutely love the area, it's beautiful, still retaining so much natural beauty. We go every year, it's heaven and they have a very nice Adder population as an extra magnet.

I know it quite well as its only 5 miles away from my birthplace on the opposite side of the peninsula. I was last there in 2005. Good area to the West for seeing Choughs and Ravens.

[SparklySarah]

Thank's for all the comments.

Came back from our annual Salcombe trip on the 25th, but regrettedly didn't get a chance to go back to Dartmoor. Was really looking forward to it but the time just slipped away (and the weather in the first whole week consisted of torrential rain and gail force winds!!! )

Just incase anyone's interested, here's another one!!! This one's about May Hill:

.Mist on May Hill.

The wet, dewy grass, dented by the occasional hoof print, mingled with the fine mist of the hills. Clouds, like random cotton wool buds, scudded across the sky, ever changing, ever dying. The horses stand there staring at the fading valley diving into the midst of rising haze, or nibble daintily at tufts of sweet grass. Expressionless trees swaying, swaying, clinging to the ground, a memorial for those who are the deceased. No more are they to see the splendour of Mother Nature’s bounty, we think, but they wander along the paths they took all those years gone by, blown away by the winds of time, their spirits drifting, mingled with the warm scent of pine and dew, ever fascinated.

Now the sun slowly sinks its head into the velvety mist of bygone seasons, wishing all ‘Farewell!’ as she sends our world into deep sleep. The moon sails into view, to keep guard as the sun visits the other side of the world to welcome them into the new day. The soft arms of Mother Nature fondly wrap her creations up to protect them from the harsh night wind. The mist spirals off in tendrils, to leave May Hill in peace, and settle into the valleys of calm and serenity.

It was written a long time ago, and is in the book I'm hoping to get published. See what you think.

Sarah

P.S: It's the purple again, Pete!!! Like that colour

[Pete Collins]

Hi Sarah,

You're not related to that other WABber Purplepixii are you?

I was just wondering the other day when we'd see some more of your work. I think you're very talented - good luck with your book! I wish I could write more like you - I write journals describing my walks, but they are not much more than route descriptions with the odd reference to a wildlife sighting and some historical data about the places or buildings I pass. I wish I could get more of an emotional feel into them, explain my response to the things I see, that sort of thing. So I'm quite jealous of your talent!

I look forward to seeing more of your writing,

Pete

[hedgehog whisperer]

Beautiful! You are very gifted. I wish I could be more creative, but I can settle to read the innovative work of others, such as yourself.

Keep it up and I look forward to the book.