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02-07-2007, 02:45 PM
|  | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Wolverhampton, West Midlands
Posts: 1,728
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Have you noticed there's always someone in when you dial a wrong number? 
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Jez |
02-07-2007, 05:21 PM
|  | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Lancashire
Posts: 3,203
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by jezlee  Have you noticed there's always someone in when you dial a wrong number? | That's so true . |
02-07-2007, 05:34 PM
|  | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boddie Why at the end of every party is there always a girl crying? | probably because I left early with her freind 
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"new improved eeyore , now with added tact..... for that whiter brighter finish" |
02-07-2007, 11:34 PM
| | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,150
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Why at the end of every party is there always a girl crying?
All the girls at the parties I go to end up smiling!
Why does nobody ever dare make cup-a-soup in a bowl?
You've never had a meal at my local pub!
henrya |
02-07-2007, 11:49 PM
|  | Member of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Benbecula
Posts: 332
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Thunder do they smile after you leave
Another few.
1. Why do men put ice in magners cider?
2. Why when the alarm goes off on a weekday at 7.00am you have to drag yourself out of bed with eyes glued closed but on a Saturday you are awake at 6.30am charging around the house?
3. Why do Southerners prefer Tomato Ketchup and Northerners prefer Brown Sauce?
4. Do cows have calf muscles?
5. Why do Women say 'Fine' when its far from it (guilty of that one)?
6. If money doesn't grow on trees why do banks have branches?
Debs
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03-07-2007, 06:48 AM
|  | Dame Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: North Kent
Posts: 6,764
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Why does your nose always itch when both your hands are occupied?
Why does your tummy have to rumble when you're in a meeting and there's a quiet moment?
Why do yogurt pots spit at you when you open them?
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The female of the species is more deadly than the male.:p
Last edited by Wild-Woman; 03-07-2007 at 06:51 AM.
Reason: Appalling grammar!! :-)
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03-07-2007, 08:47 PM
| | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by dbozkurt 1. Why do men put ice in magners cider?
| Clearly a question for me - after extensive research I can tell you definitively
a) it tastes nicer when its cold
b) it makes the drink last longer and at the price of those bottles in a pub it needs to
c) you are taking in water so you dont get such a hangover
d) after 9 or so pints holding the ice against the roof of your mouth stops you feeling sick
and
e) it helps you look cool and sophisticated and impress the ladeez with your general alround sauveness (although not drinking 9 pints and feeling sick also helps in this regard  ) - without the ice you look like a beer monster student drinking cider to get lashed quickly Quote:
Originally Posted by dbozkurt
6. If money doesn't grow on trees why do banks have branches?
Debs
| ever heard of moneytree exchange
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"new improved eeyore , now with added tact..... for that whiter brighter finish" |
03-07-2007, 08:56 PM
|  | Knight Grand Cross of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Nottingham
Posts: 12,178
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
I've nothing to add here other than this is one of the most entertaining threads I've read in a long time. Keep them coming! |
03-07-2007, 09:01 PM
| | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by dbozkurt 5. Why do Women say 'Fine' when its far from it (guilty of that one)?
Debs | Ive always thought they meant fine as in a fine for bad behaviour - e.g " thats another posh dinner you owe me"
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"new improved eeyore , now with added tact..... for that whiter brighter finish" |
03-07-2007, 09:04 PM
|  | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Grimsby, Lincs
Posts: 1,573
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boddie Why do triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones?
Why at the end of every party is there always a girl crying?
Why is it you are never quite sure whether it's ok to eat green crisps?
Why is it that everyone who grew up in the 80's has entered the digits 55378008
into a calculator?
Why does nobody ever dare make cup-a-soup in a bowl?
Why despite constant warning have you never met anybody who has had their arm broken by a swan?
Why is it that everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose? | You nicked them off Peter Kay, i'm telling
Don't forget the famous question:
If a tree falls in a forest with no one to hear it, then does it make a sound? |
03-07-2007, 09:27 PM
| | Member of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Benbecula
Posts: 332
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by eeyore Clearly a question for me - after extensive research I can tell you definitively
a) it tastes nicer when its cold
b) it makes the drink last longer and at the price of those bottles in a pub it needs to
c) you are taking in water so you dont get such a hangover
d) after 9 or so pints holding the ice against the roof of your mouth stops you feeling sick
and
e) it helps you look cool and sophisticated and impress the ladeez with your general alround sauveness (although not drinking 9 pints and feeling sick also helps in this regard ) - without the ice you look like a beer monster student drinking cider to get lashed quickly
ever heard of moneytree exchange | And whats wrong with snake bite, left a lovely purple mark around the mouth and you could tell your mum it was the blackcurrant that made you sick!!!
That reminds me of another profound question but I will not go into just now people may have just eaten
Debs
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03-07-2007, 09:33 PM
|  | Officer of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: ballachulish/duror/glen coe
Posts: 506
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
someone once told me a noise has to be heard to become a sound ,so if no one heard it it doesn't qualify ....or am i just gullible . 
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03-07-2007, 09:34 PM
| | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by dbozkurt And whats wrong with snake bite, left a lovely purple mark around the mouth and you could tell your mum it was the blackcurrant that made you sick!!!
That reminds me of another profound question but I will not go into just now people may have just eaten
Debs | I know exactly what you were thinking - suffice to say that if you drink creme d menthe its green rather than purple
though technically snakebite isnt purple - its just lager and cider mixed - you are thinking of snakebite and black aka the purple nasty (come to think of it the green nasty was made with creme de menthe  ) - i havent had a purple nasty since an unfortunate incident at a freinds wedding , where i was best (or possibly worst) man, involving a bridesmade , her white silk dress , and the suden reappearance of five or so pints of purple nasty -  ........... now as i was saying about being sauve and debonair
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03-07-2007, 09:36 PM
| | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Grimsby, Lincs
Posts: 1,573
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
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03-07-2007, 09:49 PM
| | Member of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Benbecula
Posts: 332
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lincs Yellowbelly | Snakebite and Black was great...don't knock it till you try it!
Another question, bugged me for years!
Why is it ok for men to share baths at football but its frowned apoun in every other situation!!
Debs
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03-07-2007, 10:08 PM
| | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lincs Yellowbelly | you think thats bad apparently the "kids" today make a blue nasty by mixing snakebite and bluewkd.... yuk
in the spirit of the thread so as not to hijack it completely
a) can anyone remember how to make a cheeky vimto ( one ingredient is a shot of port but i cant remember the other - clue it aint vimto)
b) who invents these drinks in the first place and more importantly why
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"new improved eeyore , now with added tact..... for that whiter brighter finish" |
03-07-2007, 10:12 PM
| | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Grimsby, Lincs
Posts: 1,573
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
I've had lager and black and that was enough for me never to try it again
One night i was out with mates, and we bought somebody this really strange drink.It had 2 shots of 2 different colour aftershock, and topped up by smirnoff Ice. He was ok until he drunk it seemed to go downhill fast afterwards though! |
03-07-2007, 10:20 PM
| | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lincs Yellowbelly I've had lager and black and that was enough for me never to try it again
One night i was out with mates, and we bought somebody this really strange drink.It had 2 shots of 2 different colour aftershock, and topped up by smirnoff Ice. He was ok until he drunk it seemed to go downhill fast afterwards though! | thats known as a traffic light - though in theory you are suppose to make it with 3 different coloured shots with different specific gravities and it takes a real skilled hand to get them to layer in the glass - when i was a barman we used to have a house rule that we would only serve one of these per person per night. (incidentally the other ingedient of a cheeky vimto is blue wkd - like i said yuk and double yuk)
I know I started it but given that we are a family site I tink we probably ought to leave the wild about boozing subject for a bit - we wouldnt want some innocent kid trying one of these and hospitalising themselves.
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"new improved eeyore , now with added tact..... for that whiter brighter finish" |
03-07-2007, 10:22 PM
| | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Grimsby, Lincs
Posts: 1,573
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
You are probably right, let them make the mistakes we did in good time and when they are old enough  |
03-07-2007, 10:39 PM
| | Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,150
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote
If a tree falls in a forest with no one to hear it, then does it make a sound?
Endquote
There's always always someone about in the forest: mice, voles, squirrels, foxes to name but a few. They are always listening!
henrya |
03-07-2007, 10:46 PM
| | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Quote:
Originally Posted by thunder Quote
If a tree falls in a forest with no one to hear it, then does it make a sound?
Endquote
There's always always someone about in the forest: mice, voles, squirrels, foxes to name but a few. They are always listening!
henrya | ahhh but how do you know they are there when you arent there to observe them - ohh dear metaphysics at 11pm - shall we discuss the nature of being next
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"new improved eeyore , now with added tact..... for that whiter brighter finish" |
03-07-2007, 11:39 PM
| | Knight Commander of the Wild Empire | | Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Chilterns
Posts: 8,091
| | | Re: Profound questions for a Sunday Afternoon
Why are speed camers so slow moving ? ( apologies to boddie who has posted that one before)
Has anyone ever heard "I'm from the government and i'm here to help you" and it been true?
Why is it always not you but me ? - when in fact it nearly always is "you"
where do all the odd socks go to ?
why is the championship below the premier league and why isnt there a division 1 ?
why do ring pulls only break off cans when you havent got a tin opener ?
why is it not a good night unless you got a traffic cone ?
and most importantly where did i leave the van keys
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