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I'm presuming that the bats that feed in our garden are Pipistrelles so, how far from their roost do they roam to feed?
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Pipistrelles can fly as much as a kilometre from the roost to feed - but it is likely they are much nearer.
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Am I right in thinking that one way to distinguish different species at a distance is by the frequency of their sonar?
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Sort of right - but the sounds they produce are very complex, and some species (particularly Pipistrelles) change the frequency they use depending on the conditions. The Myotis family are especially hard to tell apart.
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Are the ultra sonic sounds loud enough to easily record wthout high powered directional microphones?
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The main problem is whether the microphone and recording equipment has a high enough frequency response. But for many species the sounds are quite 'loud' (though Long-eared bats are quiet)
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Could I record it and play it back through my computer and using it as an oscilloscope measure it's frequency?
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If you can record the sounds, you could use an oscilloscope, but then you have to analyse the traces and work out what they mean! But if you went to known speceis roosts you should be able to get a collection of reference traces (but, as alluded to above, the bats may not produce the same sounds close to the roost as they do in the open.)
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Should I stop being so tight and just invest in a bat detector?
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Even the bat detector isn't the path to instant identification - give your system a try, and assuming you already have all the kit, you have lost nothing but time if it doesn't work!
henrya